When I think about trust, I think about our bus.

Those four months living in our converted school bus were the hardest months of my life — physically, emotionally, financially, spiritually. We set out to travel… but we hardly traveled at all. We were broke and exhausted, with very little to show for the sacrifice we made.

So when we decided to stop traveling and settle down again, we found a place we hoped could be home. My husband got a good-paying job, and by God’s kindness, we were given a safe spot on a farm to park our bus while we tried to rebuild.

We had barely settled there when I found out I was pregnant with our third baby.

Talk about urgency.

I wanted off that bus faster than ever.

I wanted a house… walls… space… a real home before our baby arrived.

But that’s not what happened.

Nine months of pregnancy in that tiny bus pushed me harder than anything ever had. My faith felt bruised. Every month that passed without a house felt like another unanswered prayer. People prayed over us. We prayed constantly. And still — nothing.

I was upset with God.

Confused.

Worn out.

Wondering why He was so silent.

But the situation was completely out of my hands.

And when you have no control, trust becomes the only choice left.

I would sit in the driver’s seat of that bus each morning — coffee in hand — watching fog roll across the horse fields. I’d hear my grandma’s voice in my head:

“It will happen in God’s time.”

And I’d repeat it to myself, sometimes through tears.

At the right time.

In God’s time.

Even if I didn’t understand.

“What I am doing you do not understand now, but you will know after.”

(John 13:7)

The outcome?

I didn’t get the house before the baby came.

I gave birth to him right there in the bus — his first home.

And I truly believe it was meant to be that way.

That birth was a redemption — the final chapter to close a painful season. God took the place that broke me and gave me one last memory that healed me. One good memory to outweigh the rest.

“At the right time, I, the LORD, will make it happen.”

(Isaiah 60:22)

He did.

Not when I begged.

Not when it made sense.

But when the story was ready.

If a mama is reading this today — weary from praying and waiting — here’s what I want you to hear:

You do not have to understand the season you’re in for God to be faithful in it.

He is already working in the parts you can’t see yet.

Hold on — your “after” is coming. 🤍